This past weekend was a long one for me. I was filled with mixed emotions .. my mood swings were all over the place. My anxiety level was high. I'm not sure why I was like this. I was taking my meds, the same ones I've been taking. Maybe it's time for tweaking them or something.I worry about so many things. So much so that I get stuck and can't do anything. Then I worry because I'm not doing anything. Then I worry about worrying. Then I start kicking myself for being so weak and ineffective. Weird, huh? Welcome to my world.
There's nothing I want to do anyway. I didn't want to play WoW or play at Pogo for a game or two of something, anything. I didn't want to watch TV or make phone calls. I didn't even want to see what an unlocked phone is.
I thought about going to the grocery store with Mr. Skittles, but I didn't. I thought about taking Hannah to the fenced in area at a school we'd found the weekend before this one, but didn't.
What a whiner I am. I should thank God for the good things I have going for me. I should (and DO) thank God for Mr. Skittles. I should (and DO) thank God for my family and friends. I have a roof over my head, food in the pantry. I have relatively good health.
But hey.. *sing along* It's my bloggy and I'll whine if I want to..
5 comments:
sure, I am game to sing slong....'buds'!
"I worry about so many things. So much so that I get stuck and can't do anything. Then I worry because I'm not doing anything. Then I worry about worrying. Then I start kicking myself for being so weak and ineffective."
Boy oh BOY do I relate to that!!!
Ohhhhh and not only do I worry, but I also make myself feel guilty as hell about it. Remember the ants...
I too make myself guilty about it and then worry even more!!!
Everyone worries. I'don't think that's weak. It's what we eventually do with the worry. If everyone didn't worry some things might not have been created.
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