Monday, May 05, 2008

Heads Or Tails #37 - Mother

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When I was growing up I kept a running list in my head of things I would do differently when I grew up and became a mother. I would never punish my children in any way. I would let them stay up as late as they wanted. I would let them have all the candy and cake they wanted. You get the picture.

It probably comes as no surprise that the list went right out the window when I did grow up and have kids of my own.

Oh, there's just so much I want to write here, but I've been trying really hard to keep private things private when it comes to other family members. The last time I posted anything mom-related was here. Even though that was written not very long ago, my outlook has changed and matured.

I now realize that they might not be ready to accept me as a "friend." They might never be able to. There's one of them that I'm not even sure likes me. That's ok. You see I went through so many phases with my own mother that I have to allow them the same space and time.

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Usually in this spot I post a video that ties in with the theme and it's usually pretty obvious why I chose it. This time I need to do a little explaining..

My mother was married to her third husband for over 25 years before he passed away from cancer. He was the only "Papa" my kids ever knew. The last time they came up to visit before he got too sick to travel I played this song for my mom because it had been a favorite of hers since it came out way back when.

Her husband had been sitting on the couch listening to us "girls" talk and talk (like mothers and daughters will do). When the song started playing, her husband stood up and asked her if she would do him the honor of dancing with him. Of course she said yes.. and it is a memory I will cherish forever.


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33 comments:

Mom Knows Everything said...

What a beautiful memory!

Susan Demeter said...

I was just like you when I was young in my thoughts on Motherhood, and yep my list got tossed out after I grew up, and had my own kids too :)

Happy HOT day!

Hootin Anni said...

I think we're all that way 'til the whole shebang comes along and we take motherhood seriously since we realize that this is a job intended to nurture and teach, not to raise duds. Y'know?

My M O T H E R is a bit different, since the post before H O T is about my own mother. check 'em both out. :o)

Anonymous said...

Very sweet memory about the dance. I agree with what you wrote regarding your family. Very well said.

bundle-o-contradictions said...

It's a weighty & ecstatic role. Happy Tuesday, my friend.

Anonymous said...

Ah, such a great memory - and that song is so beautiful. I've always loved it!!!! So romantic.... *sigh*

Anonymous said...

Hi Barb -- how are you doing? I hope fine and dandy.

Funny how you think no rules is a good idea when you are a child and then you realize in order to have order in your life and some peace of mind (more like piece of mind when you are a Mom and are thinking of so many things!) you need rules or you will go insane.
So no wonder all our moms had so many rules, they wanted to keep their sanity in tack!

My Mom liked that song. When I clicked it on, I saw her singing and dancing to it.

Mine will be up on auto post at midnight. I hope you can stop by. I think you will like it.

Happy Mother's Day and many blessings to you!

Anonymous said...

Hi! Thanks for sharing!I am struggling to be a good mom.

Anonymous said...

Hello there!
Advanced Happy Mother's Day!

Anonymous said...

Salute to all women!

peppylady (Dora) said...

I think we all said or thought that we weren't going to be like our parents.
Well I did change some things in my life that isn't like my parents and other thing I do as my parents.

poor man's nicole richie said...

one of my "I wish I had in life".
having a wonderful mom.
this is touching.
happy mother's day barbs.

c",) Morning Sniffles

Anonymous said...

That is so sweet. :)

Juliana RW said...

What a memory of mother...

My mother story in here thanks

Berni said...

That is lovely it brought tears to my eyes. I am so glad she found her true love the third time around. Just like me

Anonymous said...

Such a great memory the song and the dance. My grandmother loved that song!

Jen said...

Hey Barb, I didn't sign my name on Mr. Linkey as my blog is private so I didn't want people to be like, what the heck, but I played along with your Heads or Tails this week. I'm hoping to get my public blog up soon! I really enjoyed your post on this week's theme though :)

Anonymous said...

What beautiful memories you have, Barb. I'm happy for you.

Anonymous said...

Whoof!! What a woofenderful story. I put some stuff about my Mom on too fur you to see. Bark!

Helen/Spike and Drusilla OK Citizens said...

A beautiful memory and I just love the tie in to the video. Very romantic!

Inspiration Alley said...

I used too used to have a list of what I would and wouldn't do as a mother. Then when I became one, I realised that my list was about what I would have liked as a child and not what my son needed. Strange how our ideas change when we become mothers ourselves.

Linda said...

I think we all had the same thoughts about how we would raise our kids. I'm enjoying watching my daughter be more protective with her children than I was with her, and she thought I was strict!!!

♥.Trish.♥ Drumboys said...

Precious Memories Barb.
I also thought I would do things differently . Well I did change some things in my parenting style that isn't like my parents but most things I do as my parents did.

The Curmudgeon said...

We all had great ambitions about what we would do differently, didn't we? And thank goodness we didn't.

storyteller said...

Lovely memory you’ve shared here. This week’s post was a challenge for me … and I guess for others too. What is it about writing of our mom’s? I’ve shared at Small Reflections, but this topic was tough for me to tackle.
Hugs and blessings,

Deb said...

What a lovely memory. :)

Rambler said...

sometimes children do not show it..they might have accepted you as a friend, I think so..

Misty DawnS said...

*wiping the tears from my cheeks* This is a GREAT post.

Raven said...

Lovely memory... I enjoyed your vacation photos too...

Anonymous said...

You got me all teary-eyed too. Patience as a Mom is one of the greatest gifts we give our kids and most the time they don't even know it.

ThirtyWhat said...

Fantastic subject ... great post!

Mary Beth said...

There's something about watching your parents dance that is so beautiful. What a great memory to keep.

Anonymous said...

Wow! What a special memory. It warms my tummy. :) Thanks for sharing.