Sunday, April 26, 2009

Do They Wobble To And Fro

It looks like another warm sunny day here and I can't wait to get outside. Except for one little problem...

You see.. fat people have extra rolls. Things that hang down and flop over where they shouldn't. In hot weather the areas underneath the 'hanging downs' and 'flopping overs' get hot and sweaty.

And sometimes a heat rash occurs.

I had just brushed my teeth and was getting ready to get dressed in the bathroom this morning. I couldn't help noticing my boobs laying there on my stomach, and as I will occasionally do, I lifted them up to see what I'd look like if I'd listened to my mom all those times she told me to wear a bra back in the 70's.

There was a heat rash.

Luckily since I know this sometimes happens I had a tube of baby diaper rash lotion in the medicine cabinet and applied some where needed. (Do you know how hard it is to get that white stuff off your fingers when you're done???) Before putting the lotion away I checked under the roll of my stomach. So far so good..

I put my bra on and arranged my nipples so they'd face the same way. I'm good to go.

21 comments:

Misty Dawn said...

Ummmmm I don't have this problem... I have small 'abilities' - very, very small 'abilities'.

P.S. What's a "bra" for? :-P

silverneurotic said...

I hate rashes. Hopefully it doesn't bother you too much.

LadyBanana said...

OMG I love your honesty and your humour! LOL

Skittles said...

Misty: Oh yeah. I forgot. :P

silver: Nahh.. the lotion helps.

Lady: Glad I could make you smile.

Tookie Tail said...

You're too funny!! hehe

Jeni said...

Yeah -I know what you mean about the doggoned heat rash! It's big pain under the boobs!

Lucy said...

hahahaha I neeeded you tonight!
xoxo (the best way to remove that white desitin.. is with A& D ointment! )

Berni aka Vic Grace said...

Know exactly what you are saying, more on one side than the other. I bought myself a sports bra, not because I am athletic or anything but the advertising claimed to soak up the sweat and it worked, since I have been wearing them I have got it beat.

Skittles said...

Tookie: I try :)

Jeni: Under the fat tummy roll, too.

Lucy: I'm here every day. :P

Bernie: A sport's bra, huh? I'll look into those. Figuratively speaking.

Hootin' Anni said...

First off....I cracked up reading your response comment to Berni!!! And may I say also, this post was a hoot. Not "hooters"....but well, it's still a hoot. Nothing like hot, sweaty hooters that are a hoot when you're posting about them. Hooty hooters. Must I go on?

Skittles said...

Anni: I think the Hooters hooters need to be not so floppy? ;)

Coffee Slut said...

"I put my bra on and arranged my nipples so they'd face the same way." ....coffee squirted out of my nose with that one!
Happy Monday!

Adrienne in Ohio said...

LOL!!! Smart of you to use the diaper cream.

Skittles said...

Coffee: I hope you cleaned it up.

Adrienne: That's me. Always thinkin' LOL!

Tammy said...

Oh yeah, I have to adjust "the girls" often too. LOL

Skittles said...

Tammy: LOL at "the girls."

Akelamalu said...

OMG I've been there!!

Autumn said...

Eh, gravity'll take hold, bra or no bra. I've worn a bra since I had something to tie up (sensitive area, Autumn no likie friction) & after 3 kids, mine look like my Oma's. Very depressing when you're in your early 30's. I'm fortunate that I get no rashes, though.

Skittles said...

Akelamalu: I'm glad I'm not the only one!!!

Autumn: You mean like when you lay down and they fall off to the side?

Robyn Jones said...

OMG! You are freaking hilarious Barb! I would not have thought to use diaper rash lotion in this way...maybe I better keep some around! LOL!

Skittles said...

Robyn: At least you have a reason to have it in your house already. :)