Friday, July 31, 2009

Who Me? Shy?

When I was in elementary school I did fairly well, got decent grades. Then when I was ten and my dad died things kind of went to hell because I had to go live with my mom and (evil) stepdad. My mom was a good thing but obviously the (evil) stepdad was not good at all.

I was very shy and self-conscious to begin with and the other stuff just made me feel so very different from everyone else. Most of the time I just wanted to crawl under a rock and hide. That might have been the beginning stages of the agoraphobia I fight these days. Who knows.

One thing in particular made me almost faint and that was when I was required to give an oral book report. I guess it could have been called public speaking anxiety. By the time I got to high school I would rather take a zero instead of standing up in front of the class.

Eventually I outgrew it. When second son was in Cub Scouts I was a den mother and awards chairman and had to be in front of the group of people talking. It didn't bother me too much as long as I had a xanax or something first. I wasn't terrified though.

Of course now I talk to anyone, anywhere. It only took me ohhh about 35 years to outgrow my shyness and 45 to become annoying.

Have you ever been uncomfortable talking in front of a crowd?

6 comments:

Lady Banana said...

Always have been and I think I always will be - some of us just can't outgrow this sadly :(

Queen-Size funny bone said...

I don't mind as long as I can buffer my fear with humor. then I feel more comfortable.

BoggyWoggy said...

My old friend, Skittles! I haven't read (nor written) much in the blog-world...and I just wanted to see how you were doing!

I can speak in front of children, ages 0-18, with ease. I can speak with parents of these children with ease. However, I have completely anxiety over other forms of public speaking, but overcome it with a combination fo chemical intervention (Celexa) and determination. I actually spoke tonight at a large gathering of volunteers for a local activity...

Best wishes to you, my old friend!

Grace said...

I have been uncomfortable talking in front of a crowd. I was "cured" (meaning that I didn't get physically ill over the thought) in college... where we had to give presentations that lasted up to 3 hours long... to 45+ people... multiple times during the semester. Then in grad school had to present our suggestions to the Board of Directors of the drug company that we were doing the consulting for... 4 people in a group... and we had 1/2 a day on the BOD agenda... yea... only 2 of us got to fly in for the trip... yea... I was one of the 2 chosen (crap). Still uncomfortable at times... but never feel like tossing my cookies anymore.

Crud.. I think I just wrote a book...LOL

Autumn said...

Only recently have I discovered the effect that being locked up in my room (not entirely an exaggeration) for nearly 4 years had on me. For the longest time, I went to the other extreme & was a bit too outgoing, but over the last few years, I've been suffering from near-xenophobia because people make me too nervous. I know what it's like. ((hugs))

Misty Dawn said...

I can talk to people... but if it's a formal speech-type thing - no way.