Monday, February 15, 2010

I Can't Do It

I've been sitting here shaking and crying this morning because I had planned to drive back to the city where I used to live and where my doctor still is.

All I needed to do was to go to his office, grab a sheet of paper authorizing fasting blood work, then go have it done. I didn't need to have a colon cleanse or anything. Just blood work. Mr. Skittles even took the day off to drive me there.

But I can't do it. I can't leave the house today.

I was shaking from fear.. and crying because I can't do the most simple things in life. Like walk out my front door. I really hate being me sometimes.

5 comments:

JudyJ said...

Barb,
You touched my heart with your post this morning. I am so used to caregiving, that I wanted to just reach through this computer and give you a hug and tell you everything will be OK.

Shannon H. said...

I do empathize with you Barb. Please know that I am here if you want to talk. Hugs to you my friend.

SilverNeurotic said...

*Hugs*

i beati said...

do not beat yourself up- relax, the next time do not get your hopes up , just do if you are able- I suffered with this for many years, finally got addicted to the pills that were given to me, but got better,have you tried talking out what puts you in this state.Many online groups are good also.sandy

Misty Dawn said...

(((HUGS))) I'm so sorry, my friend. I wish I could help.